oasis says "dont believe the truth"
but
lucas scott says "truth is still absolute. believe that, even when truth is hard and cold and more painful than you've ever imagined and even when the truth is more cruel than any lie."

i think that im often more inclined to take oasis' stand. im the sort to make excuses for people, deny that the world is that decadent, refuse to believe that one could have so much darkness about himself... essentially just play-pretend and live in my own happy bubble. but i guess in order to stop being taken advantage of and to finally stand on my own, i need to be more like lucas and be brave enough to face the truth even if it might hurt sometimes.

thanks for being my daily reminder benjyboy <3

i feel that i have come to terms with kor's leaving even tho i still miss him everyday. ive gotten my answers and i know that he's safe with Jesus. but somehow, ive still been having these weird and unexplainable dreams about him which make me believe that subconsciously, i still havent fully accepted it yet. just two nights ago, i dreamt that he was a time traveller and he came back for just a short while but before i could meet him to ask why he had to leave, i woke up because of a call. i tried so hard to get back to sleep so that my dream would continue but it never happened...

at least korkor and grandpa can look after each other up there.
please wait for me because i dont belong in heaven yet

love you both always and forever.

Music: view from heaven

the hardest part about saying goodbye is having to do it again every single day.

everyday we face the same truth:
that life is fleeting
that our time here is short

and to honor the fallen, we must live our own lives well

I wrote like Lucas wrote, with inspiration
I ran like my life depended on it
and
I loved like there was no one else for me